Always Get What You Need, Not What You Want

Ever asked yourself what is a ‘need’ and what is a ‘want’? Ever had any idea that these two words are actually different in meaning? Many a times people believe that they both share the same meaning, but that is not the case.

A ‘want’ is something that your heart tells you to go for, but it is apparently not essential to your life. A fine example would be all those branded products and accessories that all of you can think of.

Yes, they give you a sense of style and confidence, but they are not the things that can help you survive in this world or bring death upon you if you do not have them.

A ‘need’, on the other hand, is also something that your heart tells you to go for, and as a matter of fact, it helps you get through life the way it should. Food, clothes, house, transport and your loved ones are the ones that you actually need in your life. Without them, your life could very well turn upside down.

Distinguishing between a ‘need’ and a ‘want’ is something that you may not want to take for granted, particularly when you are in a relationship with someone, and are on the way to that next phase of your relationship, which is marriage.

What you should always bear in mind is that the need is of higher priority as compared to the want, and both of you should never get easily carried away with all the wants in your lives and eventually face troubles in settling the needs.

Take this scenario for instance. You and your partner are planning to get married, and both or one of you would like to have a lavish and grand wedding just because you feel that weddings only happen once in your lives. But it is so obvious that a grand wedding is equal to a grand sum of money to pay for.

Don’t you think that you both would be better off if you plan a simpler wedding and then have some money saved up for your future expenditures and your children once you have begun your lives together?

This is one issue that couples do tend to cast aside when planning for their marriage life. They would get so carried away by their dream wedding, which is what they want, that they forgot how to prioritize the future of the marriage, which is what they need.

It is actually the needs of the marriage that are more important than the wants. Yes, the wedding may be the most memorable one, but would you prefer to create an unforgettable wedding, or an unforgettable marriage?

So to those who are on their way to tying the knots, always remind yourselves to place importance on what you feel you need in the future more than what you think you want for your wedding. It does not take an exorbitant wedding reception to tell everyone that you are happily married.

You can hold a simple wedding and still live a happy life together, and better still, be free from debts. Think of how marriage can be a breeze if you do not care too much about how grand your wedding is.

Most of all think of what your children can enjoy knowing that you both have kept that money for spending on them instead of splurging on a one-day event.

Remember, in marriage, always get what you need, not what you want.

Enjoy this beautiful music video by Darla And Chad Day


Liza said...

Very true! We are often mistaken by the true meaning of 'want' and 'need. Loved the article. :)Happy Tuesday!

WaterLearner said...

True indeed. I share the same views, it is not how grand the wedding is. That lasted only one day. It is how well the journey goes after that wedding day. That lasts a lifetime.

Good Post Nafa! Keep it up!!


Hi Liza and Karen...

Yes, it is important that we can differentiate between our needs and wants. Most of all, we should always remind ourselves not to get carried away by our wants, and always stay focus on what we need.

In marriage life, it is what constitutes the marriage that we should prioritize on, rather than what constitutes the wedding day. Like what Karen said, the wedding is only for a day, but marriage is for a lifetime.

Thanks both of u for reading this. Glad u like it! =)

LadyJava said...

You are so right Nafa, sometimes couple get so caught up in the wedding that they forgot the real meaning of a marriage..


Colin said...

Wonderful post Nafa, so very true too. Need and want are very different, want we can live without as it is purely the desire, need is the necessity.

You have a ‘Sweet Treat’ award for this blog at
Have a great day :)

Jenz Iggo said...

Hi nafasg,
I have always lived with this saying: "Get only what u want, not what you need" and it was actually quoted by my 82 years old spiritual guru. Your post is the first I read concerning this matter.

Nice post! I think the term also covers other aspects of life and teaches people to live balance life, for example in terms of food diet, in which we tend to overeat!


Hi LJ!

Nice to see u here! U would know this better than us because u are currently tasting life as a married person. Marriage is for a lifetime, and anything that concerns life is more precious than anything else. Thanks for your comments dear. =)

Hi Colin!

Thanks for reading this. This is something that we always have to remind ourselves. We must remember that the needs are more important for our survival in life, rather than the wants that we may desire but would not make a difference to us if we do not have them.

Oh we got a Sweet Treat award? Wow thanks. Will go check it out! Thanks a lot!!! Have a great day too. =)


Hi Jenz Iggo...

Hmm, maybe your spiritual guru has a different approach to defining what is a need and want. So do we. We would not imply that your guru misinterpreted the meanings of the two words. He may be right in certain ways. But we are glad that u can also acknowledge our approach to this matter. We are all free to learn from each other after all. Thanks for reading this. =)

Mariuca said...

I'm guilty of buying more wants than needs sometimes he he he.. delightful article NAFA!


Hi GP!

Hehe. It is just part of human nature to get what our hearts desire. We have our wants too! It is fine to splurge on ourselves and our loved ones once in a while. Just need to make sure that it is all under control. =)

Glad u like this one from us. =)

J@n!ce said...

My wedding was confirmed & prepared in such a hurry within 3 mths that there are things that I wish I could do it once again. However, I am blessed that I have a happy marriage even without an ideal wedding. It is the journey I wish to walk with my family after that. Wonderful post !!

Janice Ng

Rolando said...

I may not be on this planet long so I get what I want and eat what I want, lol j/k

Great points NAFA, it should be what things we need, but in reality a good mix is good if you use your best judgment.


Hello Janice!

Yeah that is the spirit! Always tell yourself that it is the journey of marriage life that u embark on that matters the most. Some people can hold perfectly organized weddings but when it comes to the marriage itself, they fail to make it good. So do not feel terrible about the wedding u had. Instead, be proud of yourself for being able to hold on to the bond between u and your hubby til this day and bring up your two boys very well. =)


Hi Rolando!

Yup it is all up to u to manage your needs and wants. It is not wrong to pamper yourself with the things u want in life, particularly in marriage life. LOL! Who would not want to eat and get what he or she wants right? Just like in your little joke there!

What matters is that u do not get so carried away by the wants that u become oblivious towards the needs of the marriage. Yeah that's the point! =)

Our pleasure Rolando. Glad u like it!

MakeTraffic said...

Hi Nafa, I am back from my business trip. Just dropping in to say hi.

That is a nice article! For financial planning, we should spend on need first. For dreams sometime we need to listen to our heart.

Please visit my blog if you are free. Cheers!


Hi MT!!

Wah it's been so long since we last heard from u. Hope u enjoyed your business trip! Thanks for dropping by.

Glad u like the article. Yes it's true that we all have dreams and we should reach out for them. That is in fact a need in our lives. What we are referring to are the things that we desire to have, mostly material things. Those are the things we should not get too obsessed with. We must always remember to prioritize our needs. =)

Will visit your blog soon ok? Take care. =)

septianw said...

yaps, sometime we don't need what we want. and we always need what we don't want.


Well said Septianw! But no matter what, and whether we like it or not, it is our needs that eventually matters the most. =)