NAFASG

Raging hormones, behavioral changes, peer pressure, puppy love, steering clear of family affairs, the urge to live an independent life and in freedom….

Those are the factors encompassing the life of a typical teenager. Teenagers are neither a child, nor are they an adult. At this phase of life, they are struggling to search within their souls their true identity, and honestly, it is not a piece of cake for them.

This is a period of time when perplexity conquers their souls and when that happens, it would be too simple for outside forces to tear their lives apart.

Even so, parents should never admit defeat. In fact, they should strive to change their parenting methods in such a way that can suit the lifestyles of their teens. But that does not imply that you should fulfill all of their hearts’ desires and let them off to commit offenses or involve in unpleasant situations.

At this stage, parents should be best friends to them, rather than people with authorities over them. Sometimes what they need is someone who can understand them and who can rationalize instead of reprimanding them over the things that they do wrong.

With that, here are the ten parenting tips that would enable you to handle your teens firmly yet effectively, and that could make these teens see the light behind your advice for them. These tips would also come in handy for parents whose children have yet to enter the teenage world!

1. Give them some air to breathe. In other words, do give them some chances to make their own decisions and to socialize with others. However, do reinforce them on the importance of mixing with the right people and that wrong companies means wrong path of life for them.

2. You should remember that those issues that will leave a stigma in the teens’ lives, like tattoos or premarital sex, should be addressed seriously. As for issues like messy bedrooms or leaving their dishes unwashed, those could be worked on in time and should not be addressed too seriously.

3. Get to know your teens’ circle of friends by inviting them for lunch or dinner. It would be less ethical to command your child to jilt his or her friends without any knowledge of how bad or good an influence they are. In fact, in doing so, your teen would even resort to more rebellious acts, such as not coming back home for a few days.

4. You and your teens should come to an agreement in terms of disciplinary matters. For instance, both parties should talk to each other on the proper usage of the Internet and some of the boundaries to observe when going out or socializing with others. This should be done during the pre-teenage stage.

5. Both the parents and teens should make an effort to develop mutual trust between each other. So when going out for parties or gatherings, parents should make it a point to call them and find out where they are. On top of that, the teens should also take the initiative to update their parents on their whereabouts and activities.

6. Communicate to your teens about the negative consequences of unfavorable activities like drug addiction, alcoholism, premarital sex and so on, and how such activities can impact the later parts of their lives. This can be done during family dinners and gatherings, and can be conveyed in the form of a casual conversation rather than a parent-to-child conversation.

7. Hold a small brainstorming session with your teens. Discuss on the possible negative issues that can arise among teenagers, and allow them to list down the solutions that can be utilized in order to tackle unpleasant situations. For example, if the teen discovers a friend being drunk and he or she offers to drive the teen back home in that state, you as a parent should provide sufficient cash for taxi fare and the teen should register in his or her mind that the best solution for a guaranteed safe journey home is to holler a taxi.

8. Do not sound inquisitive. In order to find out what your teen was up to or what had happened to him or her, you can kick off by talking about your day at work or something amazing that had just taken place, and thereafter, you can nonchalantly ask how his or her day was. Should something bad had happened and he or she does not wish to utter a word about it, you could just show your kind understanding and let him or her know that if he or she is ready to talk it out, you would gladly provide your listening ear.

9. Get your teens to feel a pinch of guilt at times. You need not slam on them, but you should talk in a way that could make them feel that they had marred others’ feelings. Sometimes, they just need to remember that they are never perfect in everything they do, and that they ought to be corrected.

10. Monkey see, monkey do. Your children would emulate every trait of yours, including your weak ones too. So as parents, you should be a role model to them in terms of the words you use and the actions that you carry out. In this way, they will pick up the positive traits from you and thus, being able to analyze the rights and the wrongs.

Teens do not want to be treated like toddlers, but on the contrary, they do crave for love and attention from you. Therefore, parents should maintain a balance of firmness and open-mindedness.

Ensure proper upbringing of the teens, but at the same time, be someone whom they can call their companion for life.

-Nafa Danfad